Out of Alignment

2 Dec

Ever had those times when things just don’t quite go right? It’s like everything is just off centre, slightly skewed or out of true – like your stars aren’t lining up properly. Maybe my fairy godmother has gone AWOL for a while or karma is catching up with me, but Boatbird has just had one of those weeks.

It started last Monday evening as I was driving home. I was almost there, sitting in traffic along the main street, when a car attempted to turn right behind me into a side street. I say attempted…

Misjudged would be a bit of an understatement but suffice to say that his car now needs two new doors and mine needs a rear bumper. To be fair, it looks like it should ping out…003 004

Or maybe not. On presenting the Battlescar (formerly known as the Battlestar – as in Galactica) at the bodyshop, I am informed that this just isn’t going to happen. And what’s more, if this goes through insurance, it will almost certainly be written off. Well she is knocking on a bit now: approaching 150k miles…002

I’d rather it wasn’t though. We all know that a Toyota can live forever and it is a very nice car: boring steady and reliable, doesn’t owe me anything (and isn’t worth anything), has so far sailed through its MOT each year and doesn’t even cost a lot to run for a 2.5 litre automatic (if you forget the road tax, which is Bloody Expensive). It will still whoosh along with the best of them, isn’t so bad looking…100_3163

Has an enormous boot which swallows all that stuff I can’t fit/don’t want in the boat and so, for all these reasons, I’d decided to run her into the ground.

My Toyota attacker is currently considering his options – doesn’t really want to involve the insurance company – and I am relatively hopeful that he will stump up. Fingers crossed then.

Actually, best not as this is too painful. The next thing to go awry was my right forearm. Out of the blue on Thursday, it started to become extremely painful and, being right-handed, is making even the simplest of tasks at best excruciating or at worst, plain impossible. I’m doing what I can with the left (like typing this) but everything happens in slow motion when employing your non-precision hand and some things are damned difficult. Ever tried brushing your teeth with your un-clever hand? Not easy.

Paracetamol or rub in gels won’t touch it, the doc has no idea what it is (could be tendinitis but not been doing anything unusually stressful for my arm) but prescribed stronger painkillers and said to call 111 if it swelled, the painful area increased or became inflamed/unbearable. I can’t take ibuprofen so currently on the cocodamol and hoping it goes away soon; one has to be relatively fit and functional to live on a boat and all that this lifestyle entails.

The firebrick at the back of my little stove has crumbled (I’ll forgive it as it came with the boat eight years ago and wasn’t new then) and I have sourced a new one…002

Not expensive at £11 odd but how to fit it is another story – especially with a gammy arm – but now the riddler plate has disintegrated too! So another trip to the stove shop in Takeley on the cards but for now the old squirrel is looking good…001

That’s a relief as it’s turned considerably colder out there.

On top of that, the grill on my oven has ceased to work so my staple of cheese on toast is off the menu – you could say I am well cheesed off.

But it takes more than all this to keep a boatbird down (she says hoping there’s not a whole lot more of this to come) so I’m still smiling and not really whinging and whining – more meaning to present a balanced view.

It does fascinate me though how events seem to store themselves up and dump on you all at once. Spooky.

Oh, and a funny thing to end with. TJ brought me 400 cigarettes back from Belgium (approaching half price at around £5 for 20) where he’d been working the other week. By chance, I was reading the small print on the packet (or not as I’m far from fluent in foreign) and discovered that each pack holds only 19 (19 is still 19 in Belgian)….002

So actually they are £5-ish for 19 not 20 and I’ve been short-changed by one whole pack of 20, making 380 not 400.

How sneaky is that…?

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